OK, we’re a little bit into the summer now and if you have decided to just go loosy-goosy with it, you’re probably ready to pull your hair out!

Between keeping track of what activities are on each day and navigating the 700 BILLION times you’re getting asked:

Can we go on devices?

Can I watch a movie?

Can we go to the park?

Can so-and-so come over?

When are we going to do something fun?!

or hearing the dreaded: “I’m bored.” or “It’s hot.” (cue super irritating whiny voice)

You’re likely ready for something, ANYTHING different than what is currently going down.

Here is where this blog comes in. A couple of summers ago, I was in the same exact place and I was LOSING MY MIND! That’s when I realized that we needed ROUTINE and BOUNDARIES!

We needed STRUCTURE!

Why should you use a ROUTINE this summer?

When I talk about ROUTINE, I’m not just referring to schedule. I’m talking about consistency, structure, and predictability. Creating a schedule is part of this, but digging into what each part will look like and creating expectations for them will create the predictability and safety that kids crave (and thrive off of) the most. So why else utilize a routine?

1. Reduce Decision Fatigue

I hinted at – or hammered home – this point at the beginning of the blog. It’s honestly the hardest one for me as I’m a little bit neurospicy. Every question that I get asked feels like someone is tugging me in twelve different directions!

Before creating a routine and outlining the details and expectations of that routine, the never-ending questions that were in need of constant deliberation left me drained and highly-irritable. Building out a routine meant that I only had to use that deep thinking and analysis one time and every question after that was answered by, “Let’s refer to the schedule.” or “Check the schedule/routine.”

2. Foster Independence

Regardless of the age of your kids (except for maybe if they’re under 2), having a routine and posting it in a shared space allows THEM to function independently of you. They have a question – see the board. They can’t remember the expectation – see the board. You’re busy in a work call, gardening, or actually getting some YOU time – see the board.

If your kiddos can’t read yet, using images works well too! I pair images along with words even for my kiddos who can read. It makes recognition faster and helps the mind remember the board even when its not in front of them!

Better yet – involve THEM in the process of creating this schedule. Kids (and humans in general) are MUCH more likely to buy into a new structure, routine, initiative if they’ve taken part and had a say in its creation! Plus, it gives a WE DO learning approach to a life skill that they will use over and over again in their own future!

3. Increase Feelings of Safety & Security

When I was researching this topic I came across this quote:

When children live in organized and predictable environments, they learn to self-regulate in organized and predictable ways, leading to optimal mental health over time.

This quote came from the article, “The Importance of Routine for Kids.” Click on the link here if you want to read the rest of what they have to say – I highly recommend it!

Routine equals predictability and predictability fosters feelings of safety. If they know what to expect and they know what it looks like to meet these expectations, not only do they feel safe, but they feel SUCCESSFUL. This fosters confidence as well.

How do I build a routine that works?

Alright, so we understand why routine is important, but the bigger question is, “How do we build a routine?” How do we build a routine that we can follow through with and that kids will also follow? I like to break this down into three parts – WHAT WE DO, WHEN WE DO IT, and HOW WE DO IT.

1. What We Do

For this part of routine building, you’re deciding what kids will do with their time. Here the options could be endless, but I find that creating categories allows for some flexibility and freedom of choice. In actuality, I do a combination of both. For example, I know I want my kids reading for at least 30 minutes every day, so one slot of time will be designated ONLY for reading. I also want them to spend time outside, but I don’t really have any restrictions or preferences about what that looks like.

Regardless of which you’re creating, I recommend providing a short description of what that looks like OR a bulleted list of options they have for that time frame. See the table below for an example.

READIING	OUTSIDE
30 minutes solo (independent) + 30 minutes paired OR 30 minutes Audiobook	-sports: catch/kick soccer ball/frisbee -chalk -ride bikes -lounge on patio/grass -lawn games -sprinkler/water guns -visit nearest park

This part is crucial to the reduction of decision fatigue. If you hammer out what your expectations are ahead of time and work with your kiddos to BRAINSTORM these categories, then when it comes to this time slot, their questions will be answered ahead of time!

So, what categories do I usually incorporate into my schedule?

1. reading (solo, paired, and/or audio/visual)
2. learning device time (learning programs or learning games)
3. outside (brainstorm examples to create a list of options)
4. off device time (indoor)
5. device time (fun (gaming or viewing) on tablets, gaming systems, computers, etc)
6. meal time
7. chores (be specific about WHAT chore and HOW the finished chore looks)
8. rest time (brainstorm examples to create a list of options)
9. movement time (brainstorm examples to create a list of options)
10. practice time (instruments, athletics, etc)

OK – that may seem like A LOT and possibly TOO SPECIFIC…but really you just have to figure out what works for YOU and YOUR family. My family LOVES specifics and details and they LOVED doing the brainstorming for these categories too.

Additionally, if you’re looking to simplify, you can combine categories. For example

OFFLINE &/OR OUTSIDE	REST &/OR MOVEMENT
-art/crafts -board Games -creative play/make believe -lego -chalk/hopscotch -play-dough -yard games -sports: catch/soccer/frisbee/tennis -bike/scooter/skateboard/roller blades	-lay on bed (listening to calming music, podcasts, or stories) -meditation -sit outside/swing -walk/hike -stationary Bike -workout -youtube movement -yoga -stretching -scoot/bike

Bottom line, the most crucial action to creating a routine is forming it to meet the needs and preferences of YOUR FAMILY. Create new categories, combine categories, remove categories, etc. Do what YOU need and what works for YOU. Start with what is sustainable and you can always make adjustments!

2. WHEN WE DO IT

This is where the time table comes into play. It will be specific to you depending on if your kiddos have activities planned throughout the day. My kids’ activities take place in the evening, leaving us with an entire 6-8 hours of open time to navigate. Look at the images below to see how we used this format to structure our time.

Personally I think having every day the same is the simplest way to do it (as opposed to Monday, Wednesday, Friday or Tuesday, Thursday structures). This way kids don’t have to first think about what day it is before figuring out the rest of it…

BUT…

If you have that type of schedule shift because of activities or days they’re home versus at daycare or something, you can TOTALLY adjust for that. Simply put the day of the week at the top instead of “daily schedule.”

3. HOW WE DO IT

Now we need to dig into our expectations and provide DETAILS, EXAMPLES, AND MODELING.

I KNOW THIS SOUNDS LIKE A LOT – but I promise if you put the time into it in the beginning, it MORE THAN MAKES UP FOR IT!

This page (see below) still holds the categories you create, but also provides some guidance. Here you can see that for my kids they get a lot of choices (which they can refer to on the Daily Details page). In addition, I give them some “Tips for Success.” These are simple ways they can make the most of their time and easily meet the expectations. Additionally, there may be some strategies they can use too!

For example, in the Meal/Tidy Up section you’ll see things like “NOTICE what is around you.” and “Don’t put it down, put it away.” These are two phrases that we use often in our house that THEY KNOW AND RECOGNIZE. These are self-talk tools for cleaning that will help them now and down the road!

The “room piles” is another concept we use. If we’re tidying up a space and there are things in it that belong in different rooms, we make piles and take the whole pile at once versus running back and forth between rooms.

The beautiful thing about this page is you can incorporate whatever FAMILY MOTTOS, phrases, or philosophies you use already…OR…you can use this as an opportunity to teach some new ones!

The biggest thing about this step is that YOU know what results YOU want. If YOU get clear on expectations, it makes it MUCH easier for them to follow them!

ADDITIONAL TIPS FOR SUCCESS

So much of the success of a new routine, habit, boundary, etc is determined by how we introduce and facilitate it. Again, we want most of the work to be on the FRONT END. The planning, creation, and teaching that will occur in the first two weeks is VITAL!

1. Get the whole family involved.

If you are partnered, make sure BOTH partners have a role in creating this (that way it doesn’t matter which partner is there in order to facilitate and enforce it).

PLEASE – involve the kids!

I CANNOT stress this enough. Get ideas from them to create lists. Discuss with them what each one should look like. Get their thoughts about what activity works best for what time of day. This should be a COLLABORATION – not a dictatorship 😉.

2. Teach. Model. Reteach.

Once you’ve finalized everything, go over all three pages with them. Ask them if they have any questions. Go through scenarios with them. Have them show you how they can use the charts and what is clear or confusing.

Model each time slot with them. Honestly – for the first couple of days it would be ideal to complete the schedule WITH THEM, that way you can model it AND troubleshoot any hiccups that come up.

Reteach. This is a crucial step that we often miss. Reteaching will for sure happen in the first couple of weeks, but will likely need to happen multiple times throughout the summer. It won’t be as extensive as in the very beginning, but if you hear more whining, more questions popping up, or have just had a break from the routine because of traveling or holidays, reteaching will help get everyone back into the swing of things.

3. Review it and display it.

Talk to each other over dinner about how the new routine is working. What do they like? What don’t they like? What are some of the challenges or highlights of their day?

Giving them a voice not only provides you with feedback for reteaching, but it helps them navigate the newness of the routine and feel heard. Again, we’re modeling and practicing skills that will serve them now and forever.

Be purposeful about how you display the routine. If you have a family schedule area, add it to that (I have one on the side of our refrigerator). Make sure its posted at a hight that the children can access.

I laminated my pages and made them magnetic. This way the kids could take it off of the refrigerator to look at it more closely and put it back up easily when they were done. The first time we did this I simply put the printed sheets into a plastic sheath and clipped it to the refrigerator or pinned it to the bulletin board. This worked well too. I found that the laminated version was slightly more durable.

Are you on board yet?!

If you’d like to give it a go, I created a FREEBIE version of the one I use in my own home. It’s the same style as my examples above. The freebie includes a PDF version and a Google Slides version.

I find the Google Slides version to be the easiest to navigate and edit, but if you like Adobe and have the right version, the PDF will work too. Also, if you’re not a techy person, you can simply print the PDF and handwrite on them!

Looking for other ideas for summer. Make sure you read my blog, “10+ Ways to Enjoy Summer Break.” This is a great read if you find yourself spinning a little bit and looking for some direction!

That’s it for now folks.

Download the freebie. Give it a go. Let me know what worked well and what struggles you experienced.

I’m always curious how well my resources work!

Good luck.

Talk soon.