I’m not sure which doom scroll it was that I was on, but at one point I came across a post that said,
“Rest isn’t a reward for the work; its part of the work.”
Leesa Renée
This quote put an end to the scroll. It’s depth of meaning and my own intense need for TRUE rest stopped me in my tracks.
It was an immediate save and I moved to looking into who authored the phrase. This led me to Leesa Reneé’s blog. I’m going to link this particular blog here so you can check out her own timeline of where her inspiration came from.
As I read her timeline, I was reintroduced to The Nap Ministry. I realized that The Nap Ministry was a familiar name that I had definitely seen already. The first seed of “rest as resistance” had been planted before.
It was as if the universe had realized that I wasn’t getting the message! Even now I looked at my Instagram only to realize I wasn’t even following The Nap Ministry. Issue rectified.
More than Just Naps
Now we’re at the beginning of a new year.
This is when all of our feeds start flooding with things like, “New Year, New You” and the beginning of a whole new cycle of the rat race; hyper focusing on our abilities to be disciplined, motivated and productive. The pressure to set goals, be the boss bitch, and not “waste” any more seconds of our precious time is coming at us from all directions.
Just typing all of that feels exhausting.
While I don’t want to be the one stepping on your dreams, I want you to consider adding REST into whatever plans you have for this new year.
Now, as The Nap Ministry states,
“This is about more than naps.”
The Nap Ministry
I’m not about to throw a bunch of gimmicks and recommendations at you in regard to self-care. Even this has been weaponized for capitalism and the rat race I’m referencing.
So, I’m not talking about bubble baths, retail therapy, a mani/pedi, or even a spa day.
The REST that I am referencing has less to do with these “quick fix” approaches and more to do with an OVERALL change in your approach to life.
The Call to Disengage
Are you ready for this?
This is where you decide to stop.
STOP.
Disengage.
Step out of the race.
Another sign from the universe came from the mouth of a trainer who also focused a lot on mindset and mental health,
“Sometimes the best way to engage is not to engage at all.”
TRUE REST comes from disengaging – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.
Pulling away, centering yourself, realigning with you are the aim here.
Oddly enough, disengagement takes work.
We have deeply ingrained beliefs and practices that cause us to over-produce, over-work, and over-extend ourselves. Shifting our mindset plays an important role in this adjustment…but PRACTICE plays an even bigger role.
After reflecting on my own life, I recognize that even though I did the ULTIMATE DISENGAGEMENT by resigning, all of the thoughts and negative patterns followed me out. When I say my mind was BUSY, I mean BUSY.
Disengaging made the voices LOUDER.
“You’re not doing enough.”
“You’re a quitter.”
“You failed.”
“You gave up.”
“You’re only valuable if you’re giving or doing.”
“You’re not contributing to anything.”
“You’ve had enough rest – get your ass moving.”
So much self-doubt swirling through my mind and my body. All of it leaving me even more defeated and frozen.
This time “away” has made glaringly obvious how little rest I was actually giving myself…because even though I was forcing things to slow down on my calendar and for my body, my mind was not allowing the rest to truly take place.
Our Resistance to Rest
As I was researching this topic, I came across the website Psychcentral. It has several, quite impactful, articles discussing rest (and much more) – what it is, what it isn’t and WHY WE RESIST IT.
What is intriguing to me is that while we are starting to have a deeper conservation about what rest is and what it isn’t, we haven’t dug very deeply into why it is SO HARD FOR US TO ALLOW OURSELVES REST.
The author lists several reasons we resist rest:
- Driven to achieve
- Perfectionist and controlling behaviors
- Uncomfortable with rest
- Afraid to rest
- Mind racing
- Don’t understand what healthy rest looks like
- Confuse rest with sleep – check out the quote below.
I highly suggest reading the full article. The author goes into detail regarding each one of these seven. Below is a clarification they offer in regard to number 7.
“Whereas sleep gives your body a break, rest involves the whole being and not just the body.”
psychcentral
OK, so realistically, when I read this list I was like, “Check, check, check, check, check, check, and…check.”
Damn.
The good doctor has me pegged.
I would venture to say that many people – specifically teachers – would identify with at least 5 of the 7 things on this list.
The article goes on to suggest some reflection. Check out the photo I grabbed from their website:
So, my suggestion for you is to dig in.
You know I love me a good journaling session 😉
Use these prompts to uncover your own resistance to rest. I sat down with these prompts and a couple more and simply started writing…
I was NOT expecting what came up. You can check out my journal entry here.
Let’s Recap
Rest is about WAY MORE than just naps, “self-care” rituals like a good face mask or massage, or a walk in the woods (though this can be hugely impactful – – more to come on this.)
Rest is about ACTIVELY disengaging from the rat race. Intentionally slowing down across the board. If it’s not a, “FUCK YES, then its a no.”
Resistance to rest is what is REALLY getting in the way of our recovery. The underlying beliefs that are at play. The coding in our beings that we aren’t even aware exist!
Start playing around with these ideas. Grab a pen and ask yourself some of these questions. Really start to question,
“What is it all for?”
What do you want it to be for?
I have some journal pages if you’d like to use them.
It can be scary, but its liberating.
My hope for you this new year, is rest.
TRUE rest.
Talk soon.
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